I had a doctors appointment yesterday and found out that although I’m 33 1/2 weeks pregnant I’m measuring at 36 weeks – which could mean a number of things really. Like the baby is really stretched out, I like this theory because it would explain the constant need to stretch for breathing comfort.

Or it could mean we’re having a big baby – in the 8 to 8.5 lb range (God help me), it could mean I’m growing a weed instead of a baby – because holy cow it’s a growing maniac. It could mean, in theory, that I’ll deliver early. Hee hee … I like that theory.

But what it probably means, in reality is that I’m both growing a weed and it’s going to be in the 8 – 8.5 lb range. This, my friends, scares the living poop out of me. I was 7 lbs on the dot and if my memory serves me right Aaron was right arounf 7 lbs too – we weren’t big babies, or big kids. And now they’re telling me I have to push up to 8.5 lbs out of a lemon.

Thats right. I said lemon.

So inorder to keep my sanity I’m convincing myself that although I don’t get to pick the size of the baby, which, by the way, would be very helpful, God … if you let us pick SOMETHING about this birthing process; I get a healthy baby, which is far more important than the size. Size Does Not Matter.

Everything else looks normal and wonderful – I have one more 2 week appointment and then I start seeing the doctor every week. SO EXCITING!

Although I have some angst about that as well – because at the weekly appointments they do an exam to see how things are progressing – and we all know how my body functions in stir-ups – and to be honest I’ve got more gas now than I’ve ever had – this baby thing really squishes everything, I mean EVERYTHING inside of you – and there’s no controlling the output. I’m sorry.

I hope, I really do hope that I won’t have to write another post about farting in my doctors face, although I seem to be famous for it – I’ll probably go down in history as the girl who farted in her doctors face and then WROTE ABOUT IT ON THE INTERNET! But, if we’re being honest, and we are – I might have to fess up to more bodily functions gone wrong.

Watch out internet, Jodi’s having a baby.