Breakdown

Last night we broke down and bought another pacifier. Jessica went to bed fine but woke up again around 9 and stayed awake for over and hour, crying. We tried soft music, walking around, bouncing, singing but nothing worked.
So Aaron took the trip to the store for the holy, life giving, peace loving pacifier.
She refused it. WOULD NOT TAKE IT. For the life of us she would not pacify herself. We again tried everything – music, singing, bouncing and walking. Nothing. No love.
Finally I just took her to her room, rocked her a little and put her down – then I offered it to her again, one last time and she took it. And then she fell asleep. And she slept all night. But this morning after her breakfast sippy she usually lies back down or plays in her crib for 45 minutes or so – but would have none of it this morning. So we tried to offer her the pacifier thinking maybe that was it – REFUSED IT AGAIN.
We bought a defective pacifier. It does not pacify my baby.
I did end up buying the old type of pacifier that I so cold-heartedly cut up a few nights ago. And she’ll take them. Like the sweet nectar out of a mother’s bosom to her babe – she’ll take the freakin pacifiers.
But ONLY, and may I emphasize this a little more, ONLY in her crib. Not out of her crib, or anywhere near the diaper bag for safe outings. Consistency is really the bitch here and I’m trying REALLY hard to comply with her rules of gravity and sheer force.
It’s hard. It is very hard.

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