This was my face the day we moved our daughter from a crib to twin size bed.
And today it happened again … with this guy …
The crib was the last part of “home” he had left and he was holding on to it with his dear little hands. We talked endlessly about getting a big boy bed, he’s climbing in and out of the crib at will and the space it takes up in the room he shares, now, with his sister … it’s just, it’s time.
But no, he said, he was going to sleep in his “cwib foeber and eber”.
Bless his heart.
Oh this just kills me. Look at his tininess!?
It happened fast today, almost without forethought. All of a sudden we had a bunk bed.
It had been on it’s way, we were talking about it and looking for them online and emailing for photos and possible pick ups and everything was looking in that general direction – the one of growing up, the direction of moving out of this final stage of baby.
And now, it’s over. We’ve had conversations about this very thing recently. Being “over” with the baby stage. Officially. Being “done”. I’ve been asked, alot actually and recently, if we’re planning to have more or were done and the easiest answer to that is that we just don’t know.
We’ve made some pretty huge life decisions in the past year and having a baby now, in a year … in two – isn’t even on our radar’s radar.
Which begs all kinds of questions: Like do we really want to go back to the baby stage after being out of it entirely for so long? Would another pregnancy even be in my best interest, diabetes and health wise? With my families mental health background, do I really want to play the lottery again?
Honest questions, honest answers, honest concerns.
I’ve wanted more in the past, one more. But I can always be convinced that we might as well have 3 more, too. I love kids, I love my kids. But I love being happy, too. And I’ve come to the conclusion that wanting something doesn’t mean it’s good for all parties involved. Wanting it doesn’t make it right.
We were pregnant with our boy when our girl was his age now. So people are wondering. I get it. I wonder, too some days.
Mostly though, I just look at what we have in awe and think how incredibly blessed we are to have this much. To have a girl, to have a boy.
Maybe you haven’t noticed, but I’m kind of “done” planning things in my life. I have goals and destinations – not road maps anymore.
Today was a monumental day though and I did it without crying.
So did he.