Things I’m scared of

# Buying this house when we’re almost 100% debt free (and mortgages aren’t always seen as debt, but we worked so so hard to get here and now jumping back in before we cross the finish line kind of scares the shit out of me).

# All the work that apparently needs to be done. The guts of the house alone (not anything to make it clean or pretty) pretty much need a re-do.

# That I don’t feel like there’s an easy answer.

# That the bank who fought for our business is now putting us through the wringer.

# That we don’t have enough cash to just buy the house and erase the web that seems to be getting bigger.

I’m kind of panicking and I just want to be 12 in my mom’s house again.

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